The soldiers flew into Afghanistan. During the flight commander conducts briefings:
- In Afghanistan, for the head of each killed enemy you will receive a reward. Finally the plane landed. The command "Dismiss!" And all scatter. After some time, returned, bringing with him the human head. They are suited to the commander and demand a reward. The commander looks at them and barely audible whispers:
- Guys, are you, it's still Tashkent.
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The exercise, two soldiers while on patrol entered the village. From one gate sprang a huge dog and growling viciously, attacked one of them. Soldiers had to flee. However, the dog managed to bite one of them.
- And what, then, if a rabid dog, and now you're mad, too? What would you do?
- Take a sheet of paper and a pen.
- Will you write a will?
- No, compiled a list of sergeants and officers, whom I bite.
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Colonel, appointed a new part, getting acquainted with staff, wanted to show themselves democratic, and therefore turned to one of the soldiers in the ranks with these words:
- Keep your chin up, lad, even when you drawn to the big boss. Can you give me a hand and tell his father that shook hands with the colonel himself. Chances are he will be proud that his son fell so honored. By the way, who's your father?
- General, sir.
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- Captain, we're going to drown!
- Distance to the nearest land?
- 10 cables!
- In what direction?
- In vertical!
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- What happened to the USS "unsinkable"? - Asked the sailor friend.
- Drowned.
- How so?
- Have you seen the rock in front of our bay?
- Yes, of course.
- But they had not noticed her.
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- To you have a means of fleas?
- Yes, pay the cashier.
- And you wrap it beautifully, gift yet!
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Two gardeners talk on a balk.
- Our John can learn to keep house, - says one. - Every morning, he puts the potatoes, the evenings always digs.
- Why?
- To night, it is not stolen.
- Gentlemen, congratulate, my son!
- Congratulations, congratulations! And how's your wife?
- It is not yet aware.
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